The friends and fellow soldiers and Marines killed in 2004 and 2005 in Ramadi, Iraq, are gone, but not forgotten, as new names are being added to the list.

There was Jason Sparks, Michael Smith, Jesus Fonseca, John Greer and Thomas Vita-gliano.

Army Capt. Tad Tsuneyoshi remembers them all; probably always will.

Sparks was going to marry his high school sweetheart. Smith was quiet and had just come to Tsuneyoshi's platoon, but was appreciated for his radio skills.

Tsuneyoshi, of Mililani, was there when Fonseca took one of his last breaths. Vitagliano, "Sgt. V," would come in every morning and kick bunks to get soldiers to wake up.

This Memorial Day, the Hawai'i-born Tsuneyoshi won't be doing anything extraordinary to remember the men while he's on another deployment to Iraq and in Ramadi again.

"Every day is Memorial Day," he said.

Tsuneyoshi's battalion — the 1st Battalion, 503rd Infantry (Air Assault) — conducted joint operations with the 1st Marine Expeditionary Unit in Fallujah and Ramadi, losing 21 soldiers and Marines on his first deployment to Iraq. The list has started anew with the latest deployment.

Fourteen have been killed.

Among them, Joshua Hager was an upbeat and motivated platoon sergeant. Jason Shockmel "was just a good dude with a crazy walk" who had a tattoo of his platoon's call sign.

And that doesn't include the "countless other people that I know that have suffered some of the worst wounds I could have ever imagined and continue to serve and live positively," Tsuneyoshi, 26, said.

The losses aren't only in Ramadi. In another part of Iraq, a Schofield Barracks soldier died Friday from injuries suffered the day before when an improvised explosive device detonated near his vehicle in Mosul. The Pentagon yesterday said Pfc. Casey P. Zylman, 22, of Coleman, Mich., was hit in an explosion Thursday in Tallafar, Iraq.

Zylman was assigned to the 3rd Squadron, 4th Calvary Regiment, 3rd Brigade Combat Team at Schofield Barracks.

STRETCHED TO BREAKING

As the nation and Hawai'i remember the war dead, the loss is especially hard for deployed service members who have witnessed firsthand that loss in Iraq and Afghanistan and are back for a second or third time.

Nearly six years of fighting in Afghanistan and four in Iraq have stretched the Marines and soldiers and their families to the breaking point — the impacts of which still are largely unseen.

This Memorial Day brings even greater uncertainty for service members in Iraq in an unpopular and stalemated war.

"I just wish the people back home would really sit down and think about what's going on over here," said Pfc. Jacob Morris, 25, a Schofield Barracks soldier at Kirkuk Airbase who's been to Iraq, and Afghanistan, before.

"I know they've got their own lives and they are doing their own thing, but at least on (Memorial Day), it would be nice to see the people slow down and honor what was going on."

Marine Gen. Peter Pace, chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, asked Americans to "reflect upon the countless battles with now familiar names such as Yorktown, Gettysburg, Iwo Jima, Chosin, Hue City, Mazar-e-Sharif and Fallujah."

The Pentagon said as of Friday there had been a total of 3,433 U.S. deaths in Iraq and 25,549 wounded. In Afghanistan, 325 had been killed and 1,249 wounded. A total of 199 service members with Hawai'i ties have died in Iraq and Afghanistan since the start of the Iraq war in March 2003.

'SURVIVE THIS, GO HOME'

As a soldier in uniform, Morris is constrained in what he can say about the war. His wife isn't.

Sandy Morris, who is back in Hawai'i, said "there simply aren't enough U.S. troops convinced that they are there (in Iraq) for the greater good of the U.S.," and it's an increasingly hard concept to buy into when troop families are being torn apart by death and divorce as a result of repeat deployments.

Sandy, who is against the war, said she told her husband, "I don't want you to feel like I don't believe in you or your job, and he said, 'No, it's not that.' "

Troops remain motivated to protect each other and fulfill their orders despite the growing anti-war sentiment, she said.

"He said nobody is saying, 'Oh, they (Americans) don't want us to be here, they don't believe in what we're doing.' He said (soldiers) aren't thinking that. They're just thinking, 'Hey, let's survive this and go home.' "

2 SONS AT WAR

For the Tsuneyoshi family in Mililani, there's double the worry. While Capt. Tad Tsuneyoshi is now serving in Iraq, his younger brother, 1st Lt. Earl Tsuneyoshi, 25, will begin his second tour there in November.

He returned from his first tour in February.

Tad Tsuneyoshi is based out of Fort Carson, Colo.; his brother, Baumholder, Germany.

On his first tour to Ramadi, the capital of western Anbar province and the heart of Sunni resistance, Tad Tsuneyoshi experienced roadside bomb attacks near his Humvee a dozen times, his father Randall said.

His other son, Earl, who was in Hit, just 12 miles away, witnessed bombs so powerful they flipped 25-ton Bradley Fighting Vehicles. Earl also lost friends.

"They really became adults and a little bit hardened," Randall, a Vietnam veteran, said.

Tad Tsuneyoshi said on his first tour to Ramadi "it was kinetic every day," meaning lots of gunfire.

"We worked the city hard and the people began working with us," he said.

"Men started to work, kids went to school, markets opened, the city began rebuilding. (But) something happened over the year that we were gone, and we came back to the same situation that we found the first time."

The second time, however, the enemy was even more experienced, Tad Tsuneyoshi said.

"And the cycle repeated itself, and again things are looking up and up with people traveling from everywhere to figure out what worked here while the rest of Iraq seems to be in turmoil with civil war and hard-core religious sects."

'A FRUSTRATING THING'

Part of that success has come from tribal sheiks rebelling against al-Qaida brutality aimed at local Sunnis, but plenty of challenges remain.

Randall Tsuneyoshi said Tad hasn't been saying much about his second tour to Ramadi other than it remains difficult.

"One step forward, 12 steps back," the father said. "It's just a frustrating thing."

Both Tsuneyoshi boys are West Point grads, but their future in the Army, like that of other repeat deployers, is unclear.

Earl is single, but Tad is married and his wife, Annabelle, is due to deliver their first child in June. His deployment, like that of all soldiers, recently was extended to 15 months, and he won't be back until February.

Tad Tsuneyoshi said it's "very hard" to be on repeat deployments. One friend has been deployed three times in the past four years with no more than nine months home in between.

"Family is my top priority in life, and even more so with the beginning of my growing family," he said.

"However, I knew when I rose my right hand to serve my country that there would be things that I would love to do and those that I wouldn't love as much. But I find comfort to know that my family and friends sleep another night in relative peace at home because I serve with the best soldiers (and) Marines in the world."

Reach William Cole at wcole@honoluluadvertiser.com.