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The Honolulu Advertiser
Posted on: Monday, August 6, 2007

Women co-workers: Cool — or catty

By Dana Knight
The Indianapolis Star

Hawaii news photo - The Honolulu Advertiser

Laura Siciliano and Susan Nickey work together at Wuesthoff Medical Center in Melbourne, Fla. In nearly any workplace, most will women tend to work amicably with each other, though there may be a minority that can act petty, say the authors of a new book.

Gannett News Service library photo

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The way some women act in the workplace is enough to make J. Andy Murphy want to cough up a hairball.

Catty. Claws out. Manipulative. Backstabbing.

"Thank God cattiness is curable," says Murphy, author of "The Catty, Catty Ways of Women in the Workplace."

Just think: no more sniping that Sue wore red nail polish with a pink suit (how tacky). Or that Mary went for a much-too-long lunch with the male boss (tsk, tsk). Or that Angela can't ever get anything right (what an airhead).

No hissing here. Just sweet purrs.

"Women, we've carried these reputations for years of clawing our way to the top," she says.

For the record: obviously, not all women are catty. Maybe not even most women. But there are a few out there. And Murphy and her feline-obsessed co-authors want to stop the fur from flying, one woman at a time. She, along with Marcia Ellett and Terri LaForest, have written what some might say is a controversial book examining why women just can't seem to support one another in the workplace and giving tips to bring monumental change.

The first step is admitting you have the catty condition. Ellett says it is a sort of innate behavior when it comes to females.

"It starts so young that by the time women get into the workplace, those things — gossip, manipulation — that's second nature to them," she says. "Before we even realize we are causing damage to one another, we are already doing it."

Another reason women are catty to colleagues is that the corporate world has been a man's world for so long. Women sometimes feel like they have to perform three times as well just to compete with men. The other women? They just get in the way — and need to be put down.

"When you become a woman who starts tearing down other women, you have lost everything you stood for," Murphy says.

The book asks, why not reverse the years of negativity and begin positive cooperation?

Don't get these authors wrong. They aren't trying to pick on women. The men, they acknowledge, can be just as catty and gossipy.

"Men are just as big of gossips, but they gossip differently than we do," Ellett says. "Somehow, they kind of gain a foothold in the workplace with it."

They can be shouting at each other or whispering about each other one second, and 10 minutes later they are out on the golf course, giving high-fives. Not to mention, no matter what men do, they just aren't labeled as catty.

"We want to do away with that label, and have fun with this and teach some lessons along the way," Murphy says.

The book brings to life cat characters and tells a story in a humorous way. There is Kitty, that very sexual figure everyone is jealous of. There is Ms. Lyons, who is in it all for herself. At the end of the twisted tale, women are asked to take a pledge and agree to 10 rules. Among them:

- Support female colleagues in the workplace.

- Remember that once you say something, you can never take it back. Don't engage in malicious gossip.

- See the value of women's lives and the friends they might become.