Two families connected by a violent death met yesterday in an extraordinary court session to express their feelings of remorse, forgiveness, anger and loss.

At the center of the hearing was Glenn Keohokapu Jr., convicted of manslaughter in the stabbing death last year of 19-year-old Steven Wilcox outside a Kane'ohe karaoke club.

When Keohokapu turned from the defense table in the courtroom yesterday to address some two dozen relatives and friends of the victim, they stood to hear what he had to say.

"I wanted to express my deepest condolences," Keohokapu said, fighting through tears.

"I'm sorry for the pain and suffering I caused.

"At night I lay in bed and ask God, why me?

"I wish he had just taken my life instead," he told the Wilcox family.

"I love you guys. I ask for your forgiveness. I'm very sorry."

Keohokapu, 36, was then sentenced to an extended prison term of life behind bars with the possibility of parole by Circuit Judge Virginia Crandall, who agreed with a prosecutor's argument that Keohokapu is a "persistent" criminal offender and a danger to the public.

The sentencing options available to Crandall ranged from probation, to 20 years in prison, to life with parole.

Wilcox, one of triplet boys, would have been 21 years old Sunday if he had survived his encounter with Keohokapu on June 8, 2008, his sister, Shantel, told Crandall.

She read a letter from Wilcox's father, Robert, that expressed his anguish over the loss of his son.

"Glenn Keohokapu Jr. took my son's life from me," the letter said. "He didn't deserve to be killed."

Keohokapu "still has his life and a really good family. All we have are pictures on a wall," the letter said.

Gwendolyn Kailihiwa, mother of the victim, said she has struggled over the past year to confront feelings of anger, guilt and devastating loss.

Finally, she told Crandall that she has found it in her heart "to forgive the defendant for what he has done."

Still, she said, "do not confuse my forgiveness of the defendant with acceptance of his actions."

"We will never get over the loss that we as a family and me as a mother have to suffer because of Steven's death," she said.

Keohokapu's father wept as he tried to take the blame for his son's actions, confessing that he continually abused his son when he was a child.

"It's not his fault," the senior Keohokapu said.

Deputy Prosecuting Attorney Kristine Yoo argued to Crandall that Keohokapu's criminal record of multiple felony convictions, culminating in the death of Wilcox, showed he is a danger to the public.

"He's had repeated chances to clean up his act," Yoo said. "There has to be a breaking point where society says enough.

"We have come to the breaking point. No more chances. Enough is enough."

Crandall agreed, saying the finding of the trial jury that Keohokapu is a "persistent offender" was a significant factor in her decision to sentence the defendant to life.

She also ordered Keohokapu to pay $6,289 in restitution.

The Hawai'i Paroling Authority will determine later how long Keohokapu must serve before first being considered eligible for parole.