RALEIGH, N.C. — This story was the boss's idea.

He wanted it written practically before he got the thought out of his mouth. Of course. He sits around in the office all day waiting for dispatches to appear like magic.

He has no clue how hard it is to get people to bare their souls.

Isn't that the way? Managers have some epiphany, and the worker suffers. They don't know what it takes to get it done. They don't care that other issues are pressing. They just demand.

We complain.

"Whining," said Steven Rogelberg, a psychology professor at the University of North Carolina-Charlotte, "is often a coping response."

And these days, we seem to be "coping" more.

Grumbling about the boss or the workload or colleagues has been a favorite hobby since about the time man first put tool to stone.

But a changing workplace is making workers more brazen about it.

Hierarchies are flattening as businesses strive to be more nimble. Uncertainty is rising as global competition makes jobs unstable. A new breed of youth, with less fear of managers, is introducing new dynamics to the office.

"What's happening is people are not afraid to whine in public anymore," said Gary Topchik, a Los Angeles-based consultant who wrote a book on workplace negativity.

Some companies have enabled it. To shed militaristic, top-down cultures, managers have asked for opinions. To keep valuable employees from leaving, they have catered to workers' demands. To adjust to youngsters, employers have cranked up the praise; if the exaltation doesn't come, the whining does.

MANY SATISFIED

Gallup, one of the nation's leading pollsters, in August found that 43 percent of those surveyed were "completely satisfied" with their jobs. Just more than a third said the same about their chances for promotion. Thirty-one percent said they made enough money.

That leaves plenty of margin for let-loose, no-holds-barred bellyaching.

"We whine about bad tips. That's at the top," said Kristyn Seeley, manager of servers at Mellow Mushroom in Durham, N.C. "We whine about other waiters, the schedule, not doing enough shifts.

"Another thing is the sections," she continued, her speech quickening as she ticked off the list. Servers "will complain even if you give them the good sections. 'I'm getting sweaty,' " they'll say if working the patio in the summer.

"I'm sure I'll think of something else," she added.

LOTS OF COMPLAINERS

Tune in to conversations at other restaurants, factory floors or office cubicles and you'll hear how bad workers have it: Things were much more efficient in the old days. She's insane to think that can be done in a day. Why do I get all the crazy customers? I'm surrounded by idiots.

Sometimes, the griping has nothing to do with business.

At a transportation company, "I worked with a woman who complained every day about something that was wrong with her," Beth Hartley of Cary, N.C., wrote in response to The News & Observer's request for examples of workplace whiners. "Her sinuses, her stomach, her head, her back, her feet. Every part of her body! Every day! Every hour! ... A hypochondriac had nothing on her."

POSITIVE ASPECTS

Whining is not altogether bad. It can be cathartic, a way to release stress when almost every occupation comes with more of it.

Seeley of Mellow Mushroom said she loves her job. The carping that goes on just alleviates the pressure in an intense, demanding environment.

Lloyd Jacobs, chief executive of ClickCulture, a marketing and Web design firm, encourages his seven-person staff to bring problems to him. Griping can be healthy, he said, and he wants workers to air their troubles. He hears about relationship woes, aches, pains and other concerns. "Sometimes I don't feel like the boss," he said. "I feel like Uncle Lloyd."

He does have limits. Jacobs grew up in a military household and will share advice his father, a Marine, often would impart: You're not hurt. Walk it off.

Indeed, too much griping can be destructive. Whining is highly contagious, like a virus. As it moves through an organization morale can suffer.

AVOIDING CONFLICT

Dealing with whiners head on can be difficult. Most people try to avoid conflict. Rather than confronting the person or situation, they cope in other ways. Some fire off e-mail or walk down the hall to whine ... er, share their plight with colleagues.

Hartley and her peers found a way to poke fun.

"When she was out of the office, we would complain to each other about what was hurting us. 'Oh, my eyelash hurts so bad.' 'This strand of hair is in agonizing pain.' 'This fingernail tip, the pain is excruciating!' " wrote Hartley, who has left that company. "Whenever she would complain, we would just giggle amongst ourselves."

Still, Hartley was glad to be rid of her. "You have no idea," she said by phone.

WEEDING PROCESS

Patty Briguglio tries to weed out whiners from the start.

She owns MMI Associates, a Raleigh public relations firm that has a staff mostly under 30. People of that generation require a special tact. They grew up playing on teams that didn't keep score. They got trophies just for participating. Many, she said, lack a sense of accountability.

Recruiting, then, can be difficult.

Briguglio needs workers who are willing to carry cases of wine up three flights of stairs in high heels. She needs employees who will work long hours when a project demands it and those with the resolve to fight for a client.

What she finds are 20-somethings fresh out of college wanting to start at $50,000 a year as a vice president. She gets resumes forwarded by parents who expect her to hire their children. Applicants want to know how much vacation they get before asking about job responsibilities.

She takes those actions as warning signs of whiners.

"People think that because they're in public relations, they're walking around at an event with a glass of wine, flipping their hair," she said. "I assure you, the only one doing that is me."